| / Korea Times file |
By Jane Han
DALLAS — More and more young men and women of Korea find life in their motherland so painfully tough that they literally call it hell, some even plotting to pick up and leave for another country.
But what happens when you really take off?
The Korea Times talked to 10 men and women from different walks of life who've immigrated to the U.S. within the past decade and here's what they had to say about the reality of departing “Hell Joseon, a viral term that embodies young people's sense of hopelessness in Korea.
“I'll be honest,” said Kim Ga-young, 38, who left Korea for Atlanta two years ago after leaving her job in the customer service industry. “I don't have to put up with nonsense brought on by all kinds of snobby people. But I'm facing a whole new set of problems here, too.”
Language and cultural barriers are the biggest trouble for her.
“I had never been overseas past Japan. The U.S. and the Western world is completely new to me, so it's definitely going to take some time to find my place here,” says Kim, who works part-time at a Korean-owned beauty supply store.
Park Jung-hyun, 55, who made the big move almost 10 years ago, is happy to say that most of the language and cultural barriers are a thing of the past now.
“The first three years was difficult and sad,” she says, “but once I understood the true American life, I realized that I don't have to be ashamed about not speaking the language and knowing the culture. In a way, many of us are foreigners here.”
Park, who owns and runs a coin laundry shop in Los Angeles with her husband, finds her new life satisfying, both financially and emotionally.
“My husband and I both worked long hours back in Korea,” she said, “and we still work long hours now, but interestingly, there's a much better work-life balance here.”
Many Koreans who live in the U.S. generally have access to more family time throughout the week and during the weekend, but for some, family time isn't the only thing they want.
“There's a saying that Korea is a fun hell and the U.S. is a boring heaven,” says Kim, 41, a hairdresser in Dallas, who didn't want to be fully named. “I miss being able to just walk out late at night, meeting up with old friends and getting a drink without the hassle of driving on the freeway for 30 minutes to get somewhere.”
Kim Ji-hyun, 32, an accountant in Dallas, agrees that although her stress level is lower here, something about life is mundane.
“It's pretty much work, home and church,” she says. “Life can't get any more simple. I'm not necessarily complaining, but you know, sometimes you want more excitement and spontaneity.”
Kim's husband, Ji-hoon, 34, however, couldn't be any more thankful to have “escaped” his mother country.
A doctoral student, Kim says research was often sacrificed for other non-essential things, such as school politics.
“In Korea, there is a pretty big emphasis on things outside of performance. It's hard to meet all those expectations,” he says. “Here, I feel as though I can really focus on what's important and no one will mess with that.”
Choi Joon-hyun, 50, who worked for a top conglomerate in Seoul for almost 15 years, couldn't agree more that he, too, used to spend a lot of time and energy on non-work-related matters, but for him, it wasn't all bad.
“At that time, I hated it,” says Choi, who now runs his own small business in New Jersey. “Trying to read the face of my superiors, going on drinking bouts day after day, and just caring too much about others. But now, I sort of miss that whole social dynamic.”
Many Korean immigrants who are self-employed commonly share their longing for being part of a social community.
“That sense of belonging is something we have to struggle to find in this immigrant society,” says Alina Kim, 44, a realtor in Atlanta. “That's why so many Koreans attend church in the U.S. even if they don't really believe in God. People simply want to belong somewhere.”
Blending into the real American society is never thought to be easy, she said, adding that racism, whether subtle or direct, still exists every day.
John, 41, a pharmacist in Fairfax, Virginia, who didn't want to be fully named, agrees that racism is still a problem in America.
“I'm a professional and, as much as I don't want to admit it, I sometimes feel as if I'm being looked down on because of the color of my skin and hair,” he says. “That's just something I have to be able to confront if I want to live and succeed here.”
Even those who are downright happy about not being part of “Hell Joseon” have one thing they stay up nights about.
“Family,” says Chung Moon-hwe, 45, a nurse in Los Angeles. “It hurts that I can't see my parents when I want to. Once a year or every other year is just too long of a time to be away from the people you love.”
Kim Ji-young, 38, a stay-at-home mom in Seattle, says her life in the U.S. is pretty much what people imagine it to be.
“It's relaxed and peaceful for the most part, but sometimes I ask myself if that's my top priority,” says Kim, who moved to the U.S. five years ago following her husband's job transfer.
“I ask my children what they want because I want to open up their option to live in Korea. Even if today's young people find the country to be hellish, the future can and hopefully will change,” she said.